Tom & Lisa

Are not sure how to influence your partner and present ideas that are mutually beneficial? It could be that you are not speaking each other’s language. Tom and Lisa dive straight into why language matters, the words you use with your partner matters, and how you choose to use your partner’s words against them also matters. Time and time again, Tom and Lisa express the importance of communication and why it has been the cornerstone of their relationship for 20 years. This episode explores some ideas about how you can start communicating better in your relationships and also find out the difference between manipulating your partner versus influencing your partner.



Value of Words | Tom shares why words, trust, and communication are so critical [0:43]

Verbal Manipulation | Difference between manipulation, influence, and mutual advantage [3:03]

Important | Lisa’s tip for defining a special word and not abusing it in the relationship [3:48]



“I’m not interested in shutting people down, I’m not even interested in trying to prove something to them, I want to understand their position and see if there’s something usable in that for me so that I can put it into my own worldview.” Tom Bilyeu [1:12]

“it’s so important to treat people kindly, and to make them feel better about themselves when they’re around you.” Tom Bilyeu [2:56]

“no one ever wants to feel like they’re being secretly manipulated to the other person’s advantage” Lisa Bilyeu [3:22]

“manipulation is moving somebody to your advantage and influence is moving them to their advantage […] I would say that we always moved each other to mutual advantage.” Tom Bilyeu [3:35]



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